Sunday, May 31, 2015

“TLC: The Lunatic Channel”

TLC, The Learning Channel?

I’m not really sure what one is supposed to be “learning” while watching the nonsense that this network broadcasts, other than the fact that the more outside of the realm of a normal health family you are, the better your chances that you will earn a nice fat contract by letting them display you and all your madness to the masses like some sort of circus sideshow.


First there was Honey Boo Boo, the poor child who was paraded around like a show dog and made to spit humorous remarks like this precious gem, “I’m Honey Boo Boo Child” on command like a trained (drunk) seal.

Her loving mother felt it was in her child’s best interest to keep her hopped up on caffeine and as plump as a Thanksgiving Day turkey for the good of the show, while she spends her time dating a known child molester.

I’m not Miss Cleo or anything, but I can clearly see that there’s not going to be any “World’s Greatest Mom” awards on her mantle anytime soon, and any that do happen to show up will be as undeserved as Milli Vanilli’s Grammy.


Now we have the Duggars, who look at birth control the same way they view a cancellation notice from the network, the more kids the better the ratings, so once the baby odometer stops moving so do those paychecks and they’re having no part of that.

Their devout Independent Baptists beliefs teach them to avoid kissing and sexual contact until marriage, that is unless they are your sisters, then have at them like they were a nice juicy steak and you a famished wild animal.

If you’re fortunate enough to be born a male in this family you’re golden, but if you are one of the unlucky few to be born with two X chromosomes, or as the Duggars call it “two strikes against you”, one more and you’re out, so there will be no pressing charges against your brothers and/or standing up for yourself.


The Honey Boo Boo atrocity has thankfully already been canceled due to her darling mother’s antics, but for some crazy reason 19 Kids & Counting has not, why hasn’t TLC pulled the plug on this train wreck as soon as they learned of the wrong doings?

What has to happen before these networks are proactive rather than reactive, is it going to take an all-out massacre, where one of their so-called “stars” goes all Chris Benoit before they do what needs to be done?

The FCC lost their shit when Janet Jackson showed her nipple at the Superbowl halftime show, but why don’t they do something about reality television, like require background checks and implement an age restriction similar to that of alcohol and tobacco for all cast members?

The unfortunate bottom line is this, just like with everything else in our world; it’s all about the almighty dollar and nothing else, including the health and welfare of all those involved.


Needless to say that most of the programs aired on this network, along with many others for sure, are complete nonsense, totally ridiculous and are doing more to harm our society than they are to help it.

I don’t normally get upset about the garbage I find on TV, mainly because it’s typically grown people doing stupid things for a quick buck, but in the case of TLC it is innocent children who are being exploited and put in harm’s way all for the sake of ratings.

I urge you to contact TLC’s parent company (link below) and speak your mind, stand up for those who can’t do it themselves.


Well there you have it, my thoughts on the matter, and if you agree with me great, but if you don’t then may I recommend that you find yourself a real friendly psychiatrist with access to a prescription pad to snuggle up with.

MJM

20 comments:

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    1. I take it that you wholeheartedly agree with me, or that you're a huge Daniel Bryan fan!

      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daniel_Bryan

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  2. I deleted the channel off my remote. I couldn't take it anymore. And most of basic cable use much the same format. It all sucks.

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    1. Amen to that! Hopefully more people will follow your example and do the same, but we must also raise our voices and let these networks know how we feel about things.

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  3. What? Now you're telling me you shouldn't exploit your children to make a quick buck?!? If that's true then I would question why have a child of your own at all?!?

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    1. My friend that was frigging hilarious!

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  4. The ability to exploit one's family and show their complete ignorance is a guar-an-teed right of the Redneck Constitution! How else will these kids be able to pass on the knowledge of proper exploitation techniques and complete lack of common sense to their children that they'll be having between the ages of 13-15? Teach 'em young just in case they get lost at the county fair and end up in the evil hands of social services, or even worse, a foster home! Actually, don't you think these shows maintain their popularity simply because the semi-ignorant can watch them and feel more intelligent in comparison to what's being shown? Damn! That almost sounded like an intelligent question! "Honey Boo Boo ... Save Me!"

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    1. My friend that was frigging hilarious!

      Needless to say it's a sad, sad world we live in, and unfortunately only getting worse with every passing day. One cold believe that is how our government wants us, a bunch of ignorant assholes who do nothing but fight amongst ourselves over stupid shit, that way they can keep doing their shady nonsense and no one will question it.

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  5. I'm just sorry that they ripped off the phrase "Tender Loving Care" in the first place.

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  6. You were being very generous by calling Honey 'Poo Poo' an atrocity.. very generous. Love this piece!

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    1. The child is the victim in all this, being exploited so that her piece of garbage parents can keep going to the bank.

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  7. Wonderful article. So glad I wandered in! Keep up the good work.

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    1. Thank you so very much my friend, I really appreciate that.

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  8. I'm not familiar with these programmes, Mike, but they sound weird, warped and so, so ridiculous..

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    1. Consider yourself blessed my friend, because they are horrible shows for sure.

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  9. I'm proud to say that I've NEVER watched either of those shows but they both totally disgust me. That poor fat kid AND that the Duggar family didn't support their daughters is sick and wrong! Sing it mister!

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    1. I completely agree, the way the parents (Duggars) handled that was totally ridiculous and very unfortunate for their children, especially their daughters.

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  10. Not watched this stuff here in UK, but it all sounds like weird shit

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    1. Good for you, you're one of the lucky ones.

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