“If You Write It, They Will Come”

Okay it’s hump day and since I’m not humping, I figured I would write a blog, not really an equal trade-off but oh well, you have to take the good with the bad.

Now I didn't really have anything in mind, nothing too clever and/or enlightening happening in this dome of mine, so I went looking for inspiration. I decided to take a look at the keywords that brought people to my blog; I wanted to know what it was they were looking for that made them find me.

I was thinking I would find words/phrases that were sophisticated, that sounded like something you would hear at a Mensa meeting, things that would make me smile and say yuppers I’m one smart cookie for writing that.

Although to my surprise that wasn't the case, people were seeking all sorts of crazy nonsense; things like “fat men with boobs” and “monkeys dirty asshole” just to name a few. After seeing that my ego quickly went flat like a tire with a nail in it, and I realized I was more of the class clown rather than the teacher’s pet.

I even saw things like “hot naked women in dresses” and thought to myself, if these hot women were in dresses than they’re not really naked…right? I’m was lost, is my audience as dumb as a box of rocks, or just so horny that they can’t think straight.

People also searched “white girls with big round asses”, "wedgie" and “hot cosplay chicks”, now searches like this I can understand, and as a matter of fact it may have even been me who searched it. What can I say, sometimes a man has to take matters into his own hands **huh huh**.

I didn't need a pair of glasses; because I could clearly see that not many mature individuals were reading what I was laying down. I can say for sure that you wouldn't find any parents reading my blogs to their children as bedtime stories.

I should probably have it where my readers could print out a dunce cap, all they would have to do is cut along the dotted lines and slap some glue on that mutha to assemble, of course they would have to use safety scissors and “crazy” glue because I wouldn't want anyone to stab themselves in the forehead.

This information made me question what I was doing, was I keeping myself from becoming a success and hindering my intellectual growth? Forget the “man”, was I keeping myself down, keeping myself from being all I could be like the army.

Should I change who I am, should I conform to the so-called norm and climb into that proverbial box that so many people seem to reside in? Would I gain more readers and/or would I be more respected if I did, could I even be passed off as mainstream if I took the safe politically correct route?

I quickly came to my sense and smacked myself in the back of the head for thinking that crap. I don’t want to be like everybody else, I’m not trying to be your clone, I’m trying to be your superior. I enjoy writing things that don’t make sense; things that make people laugh and forget about their everyday stresses, things that aren’t all that involved and all smarty tarty.

So to anyone who found my blog by searching some random nonsense, you’re the bomb diggity, and don’t let any tight-ass mofo tell you any differently. Be proud to be off your rocker, embrace the laughter and keep humor alive.

To all the some beaches who don’t comprehend this shiz, well too bad, I’m not changing for anyone and I’m staying insane in the membrane.

(Actual keyword(s)/phrases searched that brought people to my site) 

MJM